Chicago. City of Big Shoulders. The Windy City. The Second City. The Poly City?
There are thousands of us here, living our own lives and our own forms of polyamory. Some of us are out and proud about it, others of us are trying to figure out what it means, and some of us are just dipping our toes in for the first time. Some of us have experience going back decades or more, and some of us are just doing our first google searches. We are lucky to live in this city, to have this community, and I want to celebrate that. All of that.
One of my favorite topic of discussion in these moments is how we got where we were, what we felt, how we struggled, and how we changed. It was a true connection with people who understood what I was going through, and wanted the same kinds of things that I wanted in life. It was emotional and empowering, and I was so happy to have that little bit of light shining in for a moment.
And then the next day I would head back off to work, or back into the slog of real life, and that light would fade until the next time. I felt like I was contracting back into myself. I didn’t want to just be in that container. I longed for those communications to continue and grow. I wanted a way to connect with that community, without all of us being in that room together. I wanted a way to be able to communicate our stories, to share the experiences we were having, and have that be a part of a growing record.
So I started this site. I asked my friends if they would like to write. I asked folks if they would want to do interviews. I plan on reaching out to as many poly folks in Chicago as I can. I don’t know where this is all going to end up, but I do know where it starts. And here we are.
I know this kind of sharing isn’t for everyone. Some of us (including me) have to be a little hidden about ourselves and who we really are. We have a lot at stake. Society doesn’t seem to be ready for us to be out yet. We have judgmental families, coworkers, neighbors, friends. Putting ourselves fully out there can sometimes lead to consequences we can’t see. I know people who have been rejected by their families, spurned by their loved ones, pestered by their neighbors. Friends of mine have received death threats for being open and talking to the media. I wish I was making that up.
But my desire to share and grow with this community is too much for me to sit back. I want to be able to engage with folks. I want to put myself in a position to be an activist. I want to be a resource for others. I want to reach out and be an advocate and try to educate.
So, a first step, made with some confidence. It will take us a while to get rolling here with any real kind of momentum. But I look forward to a day where I can look back on writing this, and know that it was the start of something really amazing.